Friday, 3 May 2019

Anatomy of a shared room

" Shut off the alarm, Duuuuuuude!"

Having your best friend as your roommate is a bliss, right? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Before I start my discourse, let me give you a little heads-up anent the life of bachelors who share rooms.

WE DONOT JUST SHARE ROOMS, WE SHARE A LIFESTYLE. FROM CLOTHES TO OUR FAVOURITE METAL BANDS, WE SHARE IT ALL. WE LIVE TOGETHER, WE EAT TOGETHER, WE STUDY TOGETHER(that’s a lie).

WE START A HABIT TOGETHER, WE FINISH A BOTTLE TOGETHER. THAT’S WHAT WE DO. WE LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER. WE LIVE BY THE BRO-CODE. WE DON’T JUST EXIST, WE LIVE!

4th August, 2015

First day of my college, okay. I am at the door, screaming at the top of my lungs that I am leaving so close the door and comes a reply so monotonous that it sucked the excitement out of me, "DUDE, SWITCH OFF THE AC".

Sharing a room with someone you already know is great because you are already aware of the things that piss them off and they are familiar with yours. But sharing a room with someone you don't know is all together a different feeling.

I have shared a room with 4 people and I have shared a room with 6 people and I CHOSE TO RENT A ROOM ALL ALONE AFTER THAT *jokes*

Being a bachelor, it is hard for us to find people that are willing to let us rent their place. I apprehend it now. WE DO NOT MAINTAIN THE CLEANLINESS. I REPEAT, WE DO NOT MAINTAIN THE CLEANLINESS.













Condition of the room before our accommodation

Condition of the room after our accommodation



All this clutter you see in the second picture, it all happened because my roommate couldn’t find his PAN card. The room was already a mess, but he really outdid himself this time.

NOT-SO IMPORTANT FACT: A recent survey (conducted notionally by me) suggests that 10/10 bachelors have a hard time finding their stuff in a clean room.

Problems faced while sharing a room with someone who is in a relationship:

• They will call each other after midnight daily irrespective of your sleep.

• On some days if you are lucky enough, you will hear them fighting with each other and shouting explicitly while you try to sleep.

• The best part is when they tell you that they have ended their relationship with that person and you surmise that you are going to get that sleep, that peace you wanted, but NO!

They will patch things up that very night again after 12 am.

Ergo, I made my peace with the fact that this is a NEVER ENDING process. So, I KILLED HIM.

TYPES OF ROOMMATES

1. The one who decorates the wall with posters and lightings.

2. The one who does all the work and is still under-appreciated.

3. The one who teaches everybody regardless of his stream.

4. The die-hard follower of BOB-MARLEY.

NOTE:  when you’re sharing a room with more than two people, the room is set depending upon the dynamics between the others. The beds can either be put right next to each other or farther than the room itself.

Another aspect of anatomy is that some people like to decorate their rooms and some don’t (ME). To be honest, I don’t understand this concept of decorating. I mean, girls do this because they are known for their fastidiousness and consistency but my roommate used to do it and one day I catechized,” Why?” AND TRUST ME THIS IS THE DUMBEST REPLY I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE.

“Bro, my girlfriend does it!”

I KILLED HIM AGAIN!

When you’re living in a shared environment, then there’s no such thing as MY FOOD. No matter how relentless you be; they won’t pay no heed.

I remember this one time when I left a note on the refrigerator saying, “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. STOP EATING MY EGGS” and I left for college and when I came back, there was this another little note just below the one I had left, phrasing,” THAT IS JUST WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS, BRO” and one more little note just beside it saying,” SORRY FOR THEM EGGS”

The word roommate should be revised upon. It’s more like room-hate; similar pronunciation, though. I’ll appreciate the fact that this was a good pun. I mean what else would you expect from a PUN-DIT.

But keeping everything aside, a roommate is like a family you cherish when you are away from your home. He is the one you go to when you get nostalgic. He’s the one you can count on when you’re sick because you know he’s going to be there for you. Now that I read it, it kind of sounds romantic; but BROMANCE> ANY ROMANCE.

Now that I make fun of that imbecile, I miss those days with him. More than him, I miss his stupid alarm ringtone because it used to aghast me to my very core. For three years we were roommates and there was not one single day where I didn’t beg him to SHUT OFF THAT ALARM!!!!!!!!!!!




2 comments:


  1. The article you have shared here is great. I read your post with carefully, the points you mentioned can be very helpful. It is nice seeing your wonderful post.
    Get for more information flatmates barcelona

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I appreciate the time you invested! Thankyou.

      Delete